Favorite Links

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0><script> (function(i,s,o,g,r,a,m){i['GoogleAnalyticsObject']=r;i[r]=i[r]||function(){ (i[r].q=i[r].q||[]).push(arguments)},i[r].l=1*new Date();a=s.createElement(o), m=s.getElementsByTagName(o)[0];a.async=1;a.src=g;m.parentNode.insertBefore(a,m) })(window,document,'script','//www.google-analytics.com/analytics.js','ga'); ga('create', 'UA-47423994-1', 'fortunecity.ws'); ga('send', 'pageview'); </script> <center> <br> <div> <script language="javascript" type="text/javascript" src="http://ad.broadcaststation.net/ads/show_ad.php?width=728&height=90"></script> </div> </center> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0 height="100%"><tr> <td valign="top" width=200 BGCOLOR="#003399" TEXT="#080000" background="040c8c00erkjxk.jpg"> <bR> </td> <td valign="top" BGCOLOR="#0066CC" TEXT="#080000"> <div> <FONT SIZE="5" COLOR="#99CCFF" FACE="Arial" ><B>     jEnNy tHa bLonde</B></FONT><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#FFFF99" FACE="Arial" > </FONT><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#FFFFFF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#CC0000" FACE="Arial" > </FONT>  |     <A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE=" jEnNy tHa bLonde"><U>home</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id17.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Muh ProfyLe"><U>Muh ProfyLe</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id18.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="sHouToUtz"><U>sHouToUtz</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id19.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="nEwS!!!"><U>nEwS!!!</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id20.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="tHa jEnNy aWarDs"><U>tHa jEnNy aWarDs</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id21.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="kYoOte sTufFs"><U>kYoOte sTufFs</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id22.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="pAyGe oFda wEek"><U>pAyGe oFda wEek</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id23.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="wEiRd fAcTs"><U>wEiRd fAcTs</U></A>   |   <B>Favorite Links</B>   |   <A HREF="id25.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="QuoTsiEs"><U>QuoTsiEs</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id26.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="biRtHdAys::"><U>biRtHdAys::</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id28.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="liNx"><U><<liNx>></U></A>   |   <A HREF="id29.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="blOnDe JokEs"><U>blOnDe JokEs</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id30.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="JokEs²"><U>JokEs²</U></A></div> <div> Favorite Links</div> <div> <B>Jokes!!!</B></div> <bR> <bR> <div> iss true~!!</div> <div> ne azn gherl would:::::::</div> <div> > > > >1. be wearing platforms</div> <div> > > > >2. be wearing flares</div> <div> > > > >3. have one of those fake voices on tha</div> <div> > > phone</div> <div> > > > >4. carry a bighuge  purse</div> <div> > > > >5. carry hella pictures of her homeez in the</div> <div> > > purse</div> <div> > > > >6. knows everybody in town</div> <div> > > > >7. thinks she knows about cars, but really</div> <div> > > don't</div> <div> > > > >8. if she always be fiending for "pho"</div> <div> > > > >9. lies about her age when y'all first meet</div> <div> > > > >10. thinks she knows how to drive</div> <div> > > > >11. talks hella fast on your voice mail</div> <div> > > > >12. has a 800 or 888 number</div> <div> > > > >13. shares a 800 or 888 with her homeez</div> <div> > > > >14. carries a pager for the time</div> <div> > > > >15. has money but is hella cheap when it</div> <div> > > comes to paying</div> <div> > > > >16. has taken studio pictures more than 7</div> <div> > > times a month</div> <div> > > > >17. wears a(n) nautica, tommy, polo, nike,</div> <div> > > or adida jacket</div> <div> > > > >18. wears those fake-ass leather jackets</div> <div> > > > >19. is seen every week at the mall</div> <div> > > > >20. wear tight see-through shirts</div> <div> > > > >21. never goes anywhere without at least her</div> <div> > > homie or her cousin</div> <div> > > > >22. seems to be cousins with all the females</div> <div> > > in town</div> <div> > > > >23. drives hella crazy....cuz she can't</div> <div> > > reach the pedal all the way</div> <div> > > > >24. thinks she's fat.... when she's like a</div> <div> > > little toothpick</div> <div> > > > >25. likes it when peeps tell her she's</div> <div> > > cute.... cuz she conceited</div> <div> > > > >26. brings hundred lbs. of make-up in her</div> <div> > > purse</div> <div> > > > >27. carries a back-pack to the mall after</div> <div> > > school.... like she's a</div> <div> > > > school girl</div> <div> > > > >28. wants to get color contacts to look good</div> <div> > > > >29. is always talkin about "Asian Pride"</div> <div> > > > >30. is always reppin her nat'lity</div> <div> > > > >31. knows cities as their area code rather</div> <div> > > than the name</div> <div> > > > >32. calls a city by ?-town or ?-side</div> <div> > > > >33. if she's a good girl.... has strict ass</div> <div> > > parents</div> <div> > > > >34. if she's a bad girl.... goes out every</div> <div> > > night</div> <div> > > > >35. used to be a thug/gangsta girl</div> <div> > > > >36. loves to karaoke with her homegirls</div> <div> > > > >37. can't sing when she's with her man</div> <div> > > > >38. can write hella nice</div> <div> > > > >39. writes "sorry so sloppy" on every letter</div> <div> > > > >40. dislike Mariah Carey's racist ass</div> <div> > > > >41. dislike Hilfiger's racist ass</div> <div> > > > >42. dislike DiCaprio's gay ass</div> <div> > > > >43. dislike Ma$e's retarded ass</div> <div> > > > >44. dislike Russian's stank asses</div> <div> > > > >45. watches Dayz of our Livez</div> <div> > > > >46. watches guys play b-ball</div> <div> > > > >47. thinks she can play b-ball</div> <div> > > > >48. plays b-ball without shoes.... cuz she</div> <div> > > only has platforms</div> <div> > > > >49. if her natural hair color is nothing but</div> <div> > > a faint memory in the</div> <div> > > > past</div> <div> > > > >50. rather be single than go with a</div> <div> > > white-boy</div> <div> > > > >51. freaks at every dance</div> <div> > > > >52. booty shakes at every dance</div> <div> > > > >53. if she's a good girl.... loves lil' kids</div> <div> > > > >54. if she's a bad girl.... loves to hate</div> <div> > > lil' kids</div> <div> > > > >55. wants an Integra GS-R.... cuz every girl</div> <div> > > does</div> <div> > > > >56. asks every guy she knows for a ride to</div> <div> > > everywhere</div> <div> > > > >57. calls everyone to get a ride</div> <div> > > > >58. pages everyone with "good night" when</div> <div> > > they go to sleep</div> <div> > > > >59. pages everyone with her number.... just</div> <div> > > to say hi</div> <div> > > > >60. loves money.... regardless who's it is</div> <div> > > > >61. and they type LiKe DiS N SHiYeT</div> <bR> <div> Two college students, GLORE and BRIAN, are riding on a NYC subway when a beggar approaches them, asking for spare change. GLORE rejects the man in disgust. BRIAN on the other hand, whips out his wallet, pulls out a couple of singles and hands it over to the beggar with a smile. </div> <bR> <div> The beggar thanks him kindly and then continues on to the other passengers. GLORE is outraged by his friend's naiveté. "What on earth did you do that for?!?! You know he's only going to use it on bugs and drugs!"</div> <bR> <div> Brian replies, "And we weren't?"  <<<< nopes sorree glore.. i wont change this!!!</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> FUNNY THINGS TO SEY IN THA BATHROOM</div> <div> 1. Stick your palm open under the stall wall and ask your neighbor, "May I borrow a highlighter?"</div> <bR> <div> 2. Say "Uh oh, I knew I shouldn't put my lips on that."</div> <bR> <div> 3. Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.</div> <bR> <div> 4. Say, "Hmmm, I've never seen that color before."</div> <bR> <div> 5. Drop a marble and say, "Oh shoot!! My glass eye!!"</div> <bR> <div> 6. Say "Damn, this water is cold."</div> <bR> <div> 7. Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a high place and sigh relaxingly.</div> <bR> <div> 8. Say, "Now how did that get there?"</div> <bR> <div> 9. Say, "Humus. Reminds me of humus."</div> <bR> <div> 10. Fill up a large flask with Mountain Dew. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbors while yelling, "Whoa! Easy boy!!"</div> <bR> <div> 11. Say," Interesting....more sinkers than floaters"</div> <bR> <div> 12. Using a small squeeze tube, spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet paper and drop under the stall wall of your neighbor. Then say, "Whoops, could you kick that back over here, please?"</div> <bR> <div> 13. Say, "Boy, that sure looks like a maggot."</div> <bR> <div> 14. Say, "Damn, I knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I gonna do?"</div> <bR> <div> 15. Play a well known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.</div> <bR> <div> 16. Before you unroll toilet paper, conspicuously lay down your "Cross-Dressors Anonymous" newsletter on the floor visible to the adjacent stall.</div> <bR> <div> 17. Lower a small mirror underneath the stall wall and adjust it so you can see your neighbor and say, "Peek-a-boo!"</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> <B>TOP 20 THINGS NOT TO SAY TO A COP WHEN HE PULLS YOU OVER</B></div> <bR> <div> 20. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.</div> <bR> <div> 19. Sorry officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.</div> <bR> <div> 18. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?</div> <bR> <div> 17. Hey, you must have been doing 125 to keep up with me, good job.</div> <bR> <div> 16. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical shape to be a police officer.</div> <bR> <div> 15. I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.</div> <bR> <div> 14. Bad cop. No donut.</div> <bR> <div> 13. You're not going to check the trunk, are you?</div> <bR> <div> 12. Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence.</div> <bR> <div> 11. Didn't I see you get your butt kicked on cops?</div> <bR> <div> 10. Is it true that people become cops because they are too dumb to work at McDonalds?</div> <bR> <div> 9. I pay your salary</div> <bR> <div> 8. So uh, you on the take or what?</div> <bR> <div> 7. Gee officer, that's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning.</div> <bR> <div> 6. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.</div> <bR> <div> 5. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there is no other cars around, that's how far they are ahead of me.</div> <bR> <div> 4. What do you mean have I been drinking? You are the trained specialist.</div> <bR> <div> 3. Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my gun fell off of my lap and got lodged between the brake and the gas pedal, forcing me to speed out of control.</div> <bR> <div> 2. Hey, is that a 9mm? That's nothing compared to this 44 magnum. </div> <bR> <div> 1. Hey, can you give me another one of those full cavity searches? </div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> GURLZ</div> <div> 1. Don't ever lie to us; we always find out.</div> <div> 2. We don't enjoy talking dirty to you as much as you enjoy</div> <div> listening.</div> <div> 3. Don't say you understand when you don't.</div> <div> 4. Girls are pretty, but yours is the Prettiest!</div> <div> 5. You don't have PMS; don't act like you know what it's like. </div> <div> 6. Saying something sweet might get you off the hook; doing</div> <div> something sweet will always get you off the hook.</div> <div> 7. If you talk about having a big Dick; we know you don't.</div> <div> 8. Size does matter, but only to hoes; not girls that want</div> <div> relationships.</div> <div> 9. We don't like it when you act like Mr. Big.</div> <div> 10. A system in your car only impresses your homeboys not us.</div> <div> 11. No matter what you say, your ex-girlfriend is a hoe.</div> <div> 12. It's good to be sensitive, sometimes.</div> <div> 13. If you did something wrong or even if you didn't, apologize.</div> <div> 14. Be spontaneous; dinner and a movie won't always cut it.</div> <div> 15. We are self-conscious by nature; we can't help it.</div> <div> 16. We are DrAmA queens.</div> <div> 17. Fashion police do exist.</div> <div> 18. Don't ask us to give head; if you are nice you just might</div> <div> get it.</div> <div> 19. We absolutely DO NOT care about monster trucks, car systems,</div> <div> paintball, or anything else you and your friends talk about.</div> <div> 20. Hugs and kisses must be given at all times.</div> <div> 21. We don't shave our legs everyday so get over it.</div> <div> 22. Don't make bets about us; we always find out.</div> <div> 23. Shave; no matter how cool you think your goatee or beard or</div> <div> mustache looks, we hate it.</div> <div> 24. Even if you think it is cool to burp, fart, or emitt other</div> <div> strange gases from your body, it is not.</div> <div> 25. Don't compare our breasts with Pamela Anderson's; hers are</div> <div> fake, just remember that. (You have a better shot at ours</div> <div> than you ever will with hers)</div> <div> 26. It is not cool to shoot snot rockets.</div> <div> 27. We are beautiful at all times.</div> <div> 28. We will always think we are fat, so humor us and tell us we</div> <div> aren't.</div> <div> 29. You can shoot hoops, score a goal, knock down big fat guys,</div> <div> and hit a little baseball with a stick, so why the hell can't</div> <div> you piss in the toilet and not on it.</div> <div> 30. Most importantly: we are always right; so don't forget it</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> <B>FUNNY QUOTES FROM THE 1950's</B></div> <bR> <div> 1) "I'll tell you one thing, if things keep going the way they are, it's going to be impossible to buy a weeks groceries for $20."</div> <bR> <div> 2) "Have you seen the new cars coming out next year? It won't be long when $5000 will only buy a used one."</div> <bR> <div> 3) "If cigarettes keep going up in price, I'm going to quit. A quarter a pack is ridiculous."</div> <bR> <div> 4) "Did you hear the post office is thinking about charging a dime just to mail a letter?"</div> <bR> <div> 5) "The Government is wanting to get its hands on everything. Pretty soon it's going to be impossible to run a family business or farm."</div> <bR> <div> 6) "If they raise the minimum wage to $1, nobody will be able to hire outside help at the store."</div> <bR> <div> 7) "When I first started driving, who would have thought gas would someday cost 40 cents a gallon. Guess we'd be better off leaving the car in the garage."</div> <bR> <div> 8) "Kids today are impossible. Those duck tail haircuts make it impossible to stay groomed. Next thing you know, boys will be wearing their hair as long as the girls."</div> <bR> <div> 9) "Also, their music drives me wild. This `Rock Around The Clock` thing is nothing but racket."</div> <bR> <div> 10) "Pretty soon you won't be able to buy a good 10 cent cigar."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> yEs i aM bOreD... haB fUn!!!</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> </td> </tr></table></body>